Moments Like These
by S.B. Kisses
Summary: It is the passing moments like these, he mused, that made life either fulfilled or empty. RemusLily. Oneshot. Read and Review!


Disclaimer: Don't own Harry Potter. That honor belongs to J.K. Rowling

A/N: I know I should be off working on my other fic, which I have been doing, but this popped in my head and wouldn't leave.

**Moments Like These**

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Lily looked at Remus.

Remus looked at Lily.

And they both smiled.

That was their first memory of each other. Both frazzled from their first encounter with Peeves but still fascinated with their surroundings. Yet he caught her eye. It wasn't the magical ceiling and its many brilliant stars or the floating candles or even the ghosts flying through the walls, attempting to scare them. It was him. Him and his soft gray eyes and worn-down robes. And she was startled to see, that of the many fascinating things to stare at, he was staring at her too.

And as if the same thought had crossed both their minds at that same moment, they smiled

Strange how such a small measure of time could bloom into a great measure of affection. Even stranger how two people could smile so much without saying so much as a word to each other. But then again, most things were strange when you were eleven.

Throughout that first dinner, she would catch his eye and grin, and he would grin too. It was a silly game, but it made for a lovely beginning.

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And that beginning turned from a few moments to a couple years later. Two friends by a fireplace reading in comfortable silence in a deserted common room. A sandy haired boy in a red-plush chair and a red-haired girl on the floor, a book in one hand as she lay on her stomach and her chin held up by the other.

"Remus, what do you think it's like to be in love?"

"Lily, of all times to ask me this question it has to be when I was about to find out who killed who in this lovely book you brought me."

"You still haven't answered the question." Remus sighed and put his book down.

"Lily, we're only twelve. I know more about the eating habits of a nerkled snad than I do about this."

"Really? What is a nerkled snad?" Lily mused, a smile tugging at her lips.

"No idea." She slapped him playfully on the leg and giggled. After a few moments of contented silence, Remus spoke. "How about a deal. I'll tell you what I think when we're both, oh say, twenty. That seems old enough."

Lily sat up and stuck her hand out. "Deal".

"Deal." He pronounced as he took her hand in a firm shake. Then with a mischievous twinkle in her eye, she pulled him out of his seat and brought him crashing to the floor.

She went into a fit of giggles. He watched her laugh contentedly as her nose wrinkled up and her hands clutching her sides, and joined in her laughter.

It is the passing moments like these, he mused, that made life either fulfilled or empty.

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She watched him crinkle his nose as she led him blindfolded through the hallways.

"Lily, do you mind telling me where we're going?"

"Nope, it's a secret. Be careful now, we're going up some stairs."

After much stumbling, Lily took off his blindfold.

"Ta-da!" She said with a flourish.

He tried and failed to find what Lily was so happy about. "Um Lily. It's just the Astronomy Tower."

Lily mocked indignation. "Just the Astronomy Tower! Just the Astronomy Tower! Why Mr. Lupin, how dare you. This is the very spot where you look over the whole of Hogwarts. Why and look! The sky is full of stars tonight. And over there, by the wall in this very tower is the very annoying James Potter. Oh, and there's Sirius and Peter. Why just right there under that invisibility cloak is a cake!"

Remus stood wide-eyed as he saw his closest friend appear along with a what looked to resemble a cake with the words _Happy Birthday Remus!_ clumsily scrawled on the very pink frosting.

"Bloody hell mate! You didn't think we'd actually forget your birthday! I mean it is your fifteenth birthday, you're practically an old wizard by now." Sirius said, clapping a hand onto Remus's shoulder.

"We know you don't like attention, but you should really remember that its our job as your friends to do everything you don't like." James said coming up beside him.

"Yeah, seriously. You probably thought that if you didn't mention that your birthday was coming up, we'd forget." Peter said grinning.

Remus smiled softly and looked at Lily. She was beaming. "Like the cake? I made it myself the old fashioned way."

"We can see how well that turned out." Sirius muttered. With an indignant "Hey!" Lily slapped Sirius in the back of the head.

"Well, go on mate. Blow out the bloody candles." James said.

Remus walked forward toward the table that had materialized and took a seat. He waited patiently until everyone made their way over, Lily taking the chair next to him.

He blew out his candles and smiled. Lily looked at him, beaming with happiness.

"What'd you wish for?"

Remus's stomach squirmed at the sight of her familiar face. Not in the eeewww-it's-Snape's-hair-grease-on-my-paper way but in a just-snuck-to-the-kitchen-and-nicked-a-cake sort-of way. He realized he was staring a quickly stated, "Can't say or it won't come true." He said solemnly.

While James, Peter, and Sirius bickered over the last bit of cake, Remus took Lily's hand under the table and watched contentedly as a shooting star passed by.

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They stood tentatively next to one another under the old willow tree by the lake. Neither said a word as they watched the giant squid splash playfully around, teasing the red caps mercilessly. The tension between them had been so thick the past few weeks. _I suppose when you kiss your best friend things do tend to become tense,_ Remus thought gloomily.

Then Lily unexpectedly moved closer to Remus and rested her head on his shoulder, startling him. Then he relaxed, casually throwing an arm around her shoulders as the sun began to fade behind the trees. Everything would be alright in the end.

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He hurried after Lily, trying desperately to catch her.

"You will never catch me Remus!" Lily declared, racing across the quidditch pitch.

"Oh, I'll catch you alright." Remus said, finally managing to tackle her to the green grass. Remus whispered gently into Lily's ear. "Caught you..."

She grinned and snuggled into his shoulder. "You most certainly have. Always and forever." She murmered.

"And forever and always." He said, holding her more firmly to himself.

Something wet suddenly hit her nose and she looked up to find gray clouds rolling through the once crystal blue sky. She caught Remus looking up in dismay.

"We better head back inside." He sighed as it began to drizzle. He was startled to see Lily twirl happily, little water dots adorning her school robes.

"Come on Remus, dance with me!"

"Huh?"

"Don't tell me you've never danced in the rain." She said, abruptly turning around to face him.

"No, I've always preferred the sun and, you know, warmth." Remus said teasingly.

"Well now it's official. If you prefer that now, you have to dance with me. Then you can tell me what you like."

"I like you." Remus said. Lily smiled mischieviously.

"I know _that_." She said, pulling him up to his feet. "Come on, throw your arms out like this and just twirl." Remus awkwardly tried to mimic her moves. She laughed at his attempts and pulled him into a waltzing position. He began to relax as he spun Lily, not caring if they were both wet.

"You know," she said thoughtfully as he spun her back into him, "Madam Pomfrey is gunna get really mad at us."

"It was your idea." He replied, smirking as he stopped their dancing and held her to his chest.

"I could always tell her you forced me into it."

"Yeah?" He whispered softly as his face neared hers.

"Yeah." She said, bringing her face up to meet his.

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"James really likes you." Remus said heavily. Madam Pince gave him a warning look from across the deserted library.

"I'm aware of that."

"You don't like him, do you?"

"Oh Remus! Don't tell me you're jealous?" Lily said facing him.

"I'm not jealous." He replied defensively. She giggled, squeezing his hand beneath the table.

"I think it's kinda sweet."

"I'm not jealous." He insisted. "It's just that... well, he could probably give you so much more than I ever could." He said sadly.

Lily looked at him seriously and leaned in from across the table. "I don't care. You give me something that he never could. You make me feel special and loved." He smiled.

"I just don't want you to feel like you got cheated out of all the things you deserve. I mean, the whole _situation_," he said, emphasizing the word situation, "will make it hard for me to get a job and well, you know, take you out." He finished blushing. It was a sensitive subject, but he wanted her to know what invovlement with him would entail.

She gave him a stern look. "Don't you ever say that again. I don't need to go out if I'm with you. I don't care about money."

"But Jame-"

Lily cut him off. "James doesn't matter because in fifty years, it's you I see myself with. Not him." Remus gave a smile, and Lily leaned across the table giving him a swift kiss. This did not go unnoticed by Madam Pince.

"Out! This is a place to study, and you are obviously not doing that." They both gathered their things and ran out laughing.

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"Lily we need to talk." Remus said seriously, his Prefect badge glinting in the torchlight as they stood alone in the hallway.

"Alright." She said just as gravely, her own Head Girl badge winking.

"Lily, I don't know if this is going to work." Remus said, tearing his eyes away from hers. Silence echoed through the halls for what seemed like an eternity before she replied.

"Is this about James again?" She said softly. Remus brought his hand to his temple.

"It's not just about James. It's about everything. Everything that I can't give you."

"But Remus-." He cut her off.

"Lily. I really care about you. A lot. Maybe even more than a lot. And caring about you means caring about your entire future. James is a great guy and he could do so much more for you than I can." He looked into her eyes, hoping to have her understand. Instead he found her lovely eyes well with tears.

"Is this it then? Tell me you care but can't go on dating me, then recommend some other guy?" Lily said quietly, tears splashing to the floor. He took a step forward and had her in his arms in a second. He kissed the top of her head as she sniffled.

"Lily, no matter how hard we both try, it will never be the end of the two of us. It's just that I can't date you without feeling like I'm holding you back." He held her more tightly. "I will always be here with you, though, as a friend."

She stepped back. "I'll always care about you, too. Friends?" She said, sticking her hand out.

"I was all along." He said taking her hand. She looked up at him, and she smiled. She'd always have a special place for Remus, but if this was what he wanted, she'd do it in a heartbeat. Even if it caused her a bit of heartache.

She grinned mischieviously. "Thumb war?"

"Are you sure? You know it won't be any use. I'll just beat you."

"Oh, you are so going down!" Lily declared as their game went on. Remus watched as Lily giggled, her tears dried. He smiled to himself, the feeling that everything was going to be okay warming him like butterbeer.

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"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride." The priest said, finishing up the ceremony. James grinned and kissed a blushing Lily. Remus watched, smiling good-naturedly.

He sat quietly as they had their first dance as husband and wife and stayed in his seat as others began to gather on the dance floor. He was happy for them, really, he was. But seeing Lily in her wedding dress had caused him to feel a slight twinge of regret. James was a lucky man. He sighed as Sirius patted him on the back as he went off to dance with Lily's maid of honor, leaving him at the empty table.

Remus felt a tap on his shoulder. He looked up, startled to find Lily, his Lily, looking at him.

"Hey Remus. Wanna dance with little old me?"

"You may be short Lily, but you aren't anywhere near old." He said, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. "Wait a minute? Is that a white hair?"

Lily punched him playfully in the shoulder. "Come on Remus! I saved the first dance after the _other_ first dance, of course, for you!"

"Couldn't you have just said the second dance?" He said, amused.

"Well, yes, I suppose. But it wouldn't have been as interesting."

"You're the grandest thing Lily." He said, shaking his head.

"Only second to you." She said softly, taking his hand and leading him to the dance floor. He put his hand on her waist as a soft, nostalgic melody filled the room and wrapped itself around the flower and the werewolf. The rest of the room was oblivious as the two entered their own world.

"How are you doing Lily?" He asked quietly.

"Same old, same old." She said, smiling gently. "And you Remus? It has been a while."

"Same old, same old." He said softly. "Ironic, isn't it? You marrying James."

"Very, but I suppose persistence pays off. I always though I'd end up marrying you." She said, looking him in the eye with a remorseful expression.

"Me, too. But, hey, it all turned out okay. You fell in love with James and he is madly in love with you." He said, his hand brushing her hair away from her forehead.

"But what about you Remus? You don't have anyone to love." She said her gaze intensifying.

"Yes, I do. I have you, and you have me. Always and forever." He said, resting his chin on the top of her head as she placed her head on his shoulder.

"And forever and always." She murmured, swaying to the music, the image of a red-headed girl dancing with a sandy-haired boy in the rain filling both their minds.

**.x.x.**

_Her lies Lily Potter._

_Loving Friend._ _Loving Mother. Loving Wife. _

_Forever in our hearts._

Remus stood in front of her grave, a bouquet of pink roses clutched in the limp right arm at his side. The wind ruffled his tie and hair, blowing a few rose petals into the sky.

He wordlessly knelt down and put the roses carefully in front of her grave. Still kneeling, he sighed.

"Hello, Lily, dear." He whispered. "Well, I'm twenty and-and..." His voice began to choke. "And if you were still alive, you'd be twenty."

He cleared his throat and continued. "I know you must think it's silly of me to fulfill a promise we made back when we were twelve, but I needed to come here."

He scratched his head. "Okay, um, let's see. What's it like to be in love?"

He paused as if to think. He continued slowly and shakily. "It's like dying but being born again. It's like meeting someone for only a moment, but feeling like you've known them for an eternity. It's giggling with your best friend with a good book in hand, birthday parties under the stars, learning to dance in the rain when you only knew how to walk in the sun, and getting kicked out of libraries but not caring. Lily, it's letting go but holding on. Love is so many things. Love is nothing and everything, an oxymoron unto itself. Love is me with you." He said, his voice choking and silence resumed until he gained his composure.

"Lily, I love you. I know I never said it out loud before, but I do. I hope that wherever you are, you're happy and just as loud and bright as you were when you were here with us. With me." He placed his hand over his eyes. He got up and took one last look at her grave.

He passed by James's grave and said. "Good job, old boy. You did better than I expected. I just hope you continue to take care of her wherever you two are." With that, he patted the grave stone and headed down the dirt path, hands in his pockets, whistling the Hogwarts School song.

**The end.**

A/N: I love Remus and Lily stories. They're always so sweet, innocent, and melancholy. I hope you enjoyed. And remember to REVIEW! Constructive criticism welcome, too.


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